As we grab our popcorn and welcome the movies of 2019 with open arms, we (the people of the Matrix) take a look back and reflect on the movies that made us cry, laugh, hide-behind-a-cushion, angry and made-us-want-to-walk-out-of-a-theatre-midway-through-a-movie in 2018.
Yes, this is an article on both the best and worst movies that 2018 brought us. And yes, this may be the 50th article you’ve seen that has listed the best and worst movies of 2018.
But, before you roll your eyes and say: “Not this again.” Your mission, should you just to accept it, is to carry on reading this article as there may be some surprise additions from either list that you either haven’t seen or haven’t made your own list.
So, let’s kick off this article with the best movies of 2018 and it’s pretty much safe to say that it was a pretty great year for cinema in 2018.
There is absolutely no surprise here. It took the world by storm. Even non-CBMers and geeks went to Avengers: Infinity War just to see what all the hullabaloo was about. How else did this movie surpass $2 billion at the global box office?!
It was the fascination of the film, the captivation of the storyline and special effects, and the consternation of putting all that star power on the screen at the same time and having it work. There was a veritable ‘Hollywood Walk of Fame’ on the screen and narry a story about primadonna attitudes or selfish misgivings about what character should dominate.
Shoot, Idris Elba who is easily one of the more accomplished actors in the ensemble dies within minutes of the movie. And, he was proud to do it. This movie did things Tarantino only prays happens for his 2019 Oscar-bid and circus cast Once Upon a Time in Hollywood. This movie was more than a majestic piece to any nerd collection; it was a triumph in film making in any setting.
2. Mission Impossible: Fallout — Easily, the best of the series for stunts, stars, and skill.
3. Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse — Arguably, the best of the franchise. Yes, possibly better than Raimi’s sequel.
4. A Quiet Place — A full movie with only 90 lines of dialogue?! Epic.
5. Upgrade — Think a cyberpunk classic that mixes the rage and origin of symbiotic Venom with acuity and skill of The Lawnmower Man.
6. BumbleBee — Yeah, it was that good. Suck it, Michael Bay.
7. Blackkklansman — So, that’s where Spike Lee has been. He should stick with real stories.
8. Halloween — Michael was back in a huge way. May he never leave again.
What The Ring did for VHS tapes, Slender Man did for memes — only, by creating cotton mouth audiences laugh hysterically and question their lives for spending $10 to watch this drivel. Forget the woeful rankings on Rotten Tomatoes and Metacritic (7% and 30% disrespectively). This movie was so stupid, preteens asked parents to see it on account they heard “it’s a comedy, right” (true story).
The Internet’s favorite boogeyman became Hollywood’s most hated movie. Name every stereotype about a horror movie and this film portrayed it. Consider everything you hate about going to the movies and odds are this concoction of milk duds and warm milk showed it all off. Hell, thousands wished this movie disappeared like the meme did. At least then, this movie would have a modicum of entertainment.
Has there ever been a campaign to get the most Razzies in motion picture history? If not, someone in charge of this flicked booger at the screen should lie and fake that premise. Maybe then there would be some satisfaction. “Oh, they tried to suck out loud that much.” Milwaukee got the idea the rest of the country should have adopted — they banned showing it. Too bad the rest of us didn’t have that privilege.
2. Fifty Shades Freed – How can someone with that much money not buy a personality?
3. A Wrinkle In Time – Any other year, this takes the gold. Yeah, Oprah, we’re talking to you.
4. Skyscraper – No. No one makes that jump, Rock. Not one person you engineering dope.
5. A.X.L. – How come this mechanical dog couldn’t have peed in a puddle and shocked itself out of its own misery?
6. Gotti – John Gotti, Jr. said, “Travolta didn’t have my dad’s swagger.” Those who paid to see this said, “What’s swagger?”
7. The Nun – People who have gone to Catholic school had nuns scarier than this cantankerous old broad.
8. Robin Hood – $100 million budget. $14 million profit. And the production house probably charged their parents to see it. Not a bullseye at all.